Its the 9th of September.Asking myself - Am i prepared for the Final Year Exam that coming?..Think think think again and again.I need to buck up on my science and my combined humanities after slacking too much in the two subjects.Erm, maybe its time for me to change and have more confidence in myself to be prepared.I'll need a personal tutor soon:) but it's going to cost much:the rate my dad paid for my bro is every 4 lesson is $560.I think i need that to have more guidance for my EOY and my next year N-Levels.I need to go sec 5 to fullfil my dreams.Like what dad said,i can provide you everything that you want to be but your must work for it.Hmm...I'll pay full attention towards studies starting from 2010.Insyaallah may god bless me with all the good return.

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The day was damn bored!I'm still suffering from boredom but i'll change the whole life of me.Woke up in the morning, the only thing i would do is sit near my pond and read newspaper,from front to back.haha!.After that watched TV and played games(psp and x-box).After a few moments, it blew me off to boredom.Next i think what else i can do usefully.Ohh...dad asked me to wash the outdoor tiles near the garden using the pressure jet water spray.Well, do it for nearly 2 hours.Then rest back to my room.Tired, but still play game?..It's just to relax my mind maybe.Then waited for breakfast time.We had breakfast together then me,dad and bro went for prayers at the masjid petempatan melayu which is 5 mins walk from my home.Came back at 10pm.That why now i'm here...HAHA! Gladly my family is very very advanced.Planned for the next few days already.Here it goes..

While sitting and planning with dad , he asked me whether tomorrow morning want to follow him back to kampong in Malaysia(Batu Pahat).Hmm..well,since i've nothing on i would rather follow him.The purpose is to buy some kueh and rice *whatever to give to my kampong which my greatgrandmother is staying there.Yeah!i could sit in the car which dad will drive his volvo at least 180km along the malaysia expressway.Haha! Such a sporty dad!

After talking about that, now talk about this coming Saturday.We're inviting all our relative for breakfast together at my house.It's going to be packed.Planning what to cook so i suggest all la..

• Chilli Crab
• Cereal Prawn and BBQ want!
• Seabass fish
• Chicken BBQ
• Got somemore !but .....forgot!sorry!hees!

The plan was we pray when its breakfast time first then we continue our breakfast after prayers.After food,we'll have to go mosque for prayers too!Ohh!forgotten something.Tomorrow breakfast will be at Bottle Tree Village which is also 5minutes walk from my home.My cousins will be celbrating of of it's son birthday:)..COOL!Well,i'd rather say that i felt very sorry whenever i see my results.Asking myself:Why am i not working so hard to achieve the good grades but dad is working so hard.If talk about this,i can tell i'll drop into tears.Many times had alreday happen.Please.Don't make this happen again.

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Whenever i look up at the sky, i think of you

The moment i walked alone in the park,i wished you could be by my side

While i'm enjoying myselfs,i wished you could have the fun with me

Lastly, i think you the best for me but i am still thinking whether to make the first move or not.If i make then i'll need to take care of you and make sure you're always at your best:)

Let's make this statement last and foreall.

I want you to be the one best for me on life.Not only now.I can only concentrate more on you if i finish my overseas studies that i'll get my bachelor degree.From that time on, you'll see the difference how i treat you.I need to have my career which is to become a airforce pilot then i can continue on having what i want.

sorry everyone if i'm a disgrace or blunder to all of your.i'm down in tears after writing all these.these are all coming out from my heart.pls parents,i cannot go on if something happens like before.i could only hold my last breath if no one is there to take care of me.I need some time and support.remember almost every night before i sleep,it'll turn into a tearful thoughts.i'll face in tears every night just to think of you.only you.Sometimes i'd rather stay on my own if i kept thinking of the past which always made my tears down.Only the morning,you'll light up my day.No one else.I just wished that we will be together soon:)

Labels: tears felt down till my heart